Okay, let's kick this off in proper style. Neil Garvey, former President and CEO of TyCom (a subsidiary of Tyco International) is again trying to unload his 14,000 square foot, 17 room mansion on Shapleigh Island in Portsmouth.
Garvey, 46, and his wife, Helen, purchased the land and a home at 518 New Castle Ave. in 2000. They demolished an existing 200-year-old house and built the mansion you see here in its place.
Listed for $8,500,000 this is not only the most expensive home on the market but also the largest and most expensive home in Portsmouth. Assessed at $6,523,400 this bad boy brings in a cool $110,000 in property taxes to the city each year.
Realtor Barbara Shea-Smucker of Tate Foss has once again been enlisted to unload this beast. Can you blame her when you think of the possible commission? She describes this beauty as follows, "This waterfront Shingle Style estate has every possible amentity. Spectacular finish work with Georgian-style millwork, Tuscan columns, wainscotting, beadboard. Breathtaking home in a premier location!" All very true, Barbara, but who in this God foresaken, reeking economy will be the one to pony up this kind of cake?
According to CNN Money, Garvey borrowed $5 million from Tyco to relocate to New Hampshire back in their pre-SEC investigation glory days. Apparently Dennis Kozlowski offered this generous relocation package to several executives without the board's knowledge and as far as we can tell the loan is still outstanding. Garvey and other Tyco executives were accused of deceptive and false representation that caused TyCom investors to lose more than $1 billion. Though the subject of several class action lawsuits, Garvey never did any time for his part. (Obviously the man is walking around with a horeshoe up his ass.)
This house first went on the market in 2005 for $12 million and surprise, surprise no bites even in a strong housing market. Garvey tried again in 2007 to sell, this time dropping the price to $9.5 million. No takers.
Despite all signs of a personal financial crisis we can't find any indication of it. Taxes are paid, there are no leins or threats of foreclosure filed. Garvey and his wife appear to be the quintessential society couple with a membership at the Wentworth By The Sea Country Club and making frequent charitable contributions to Families First and Crossroads House, not to mention the predictable campaign contributions to several Republicans including John Sununu, Judd Gregg and the Orrin Hatch Presidentail Exploratory Committee (snicker, snicker).
So, hang on tight to that horseshoe, Garvey... you're going to need it!
*images via Tateandfoss.com